The recent wave of “Me Too” touched my heart deeply and made me very thoughtful. What can we change?
In the past weeks, I had a few conversations with my husband about this issue of “Me Too”, and I shared my sorrow and hope with him. Now it’s time to share it publicly. I hope we’ll keep this big, huge wave of “Me Too” in our presence and start or continue the healing process. This big courageous step of women voicing publicly and showing their deep wounds and vulnerability needs to be held with compassion and tenderness for more than only a few days.
If we think about how long the issue has existed, we cannot expect that any healing process can be achieved in just a few days.
Now and as a next step, it is required to continue the “Me Too” process that just opened in the field and was felt strongly all over the world.
The challenging part is to stay with persistence and patience and to make a healthy shift happen. We tend to escape and run away from this central issue as we often do when it becomes narrow and heavy. It’s also a kind of natural reaction in us human beings. To speak generally, all issues that have cycled for years in our world and have been repeated become louder and bubble to the surface in today’s world. People aren’t withholding anymore, and silent voices are coming out more.
It is part of the 21st century – the time of transition and the time of illumination and awakening in our world.
The crises and turmoils in our world are necessary to wake us up, to raise our consciousness in order to make the shift in our time of transition happen. Crises and tensions such as world issues or natural disasters or just in daily relationships are useful energies to become more conscious and to learn from each other.
What is important in a process of crises and tensions?
To my point of view, it’s important to get every process going until a state of balance is reached again and going from there to following the natural flow of the river in daily life. This is how I see moving forward and making changes is possible.I feel like we often stay stuck in polarities and bounce back into the old pattern what keeps us from balancing a process- a process such as “me too”. We aren’t trusting enough the natural flow of processes. The tendencies of human natures are often to repress a process or to interrupt it before it’s completed or we’re holding onto the old pattern, structures, and habits and trying to control them because of a lack of trust into new and unknown. And actually in the unknown is the magic and wonder happening.
What we often forget is, that we don’t know everything. There’s a higher intelligence than our human intelligence that knows more. We need to trust more this higher intelligence!
I hope that we all – men and women – in our today’s society worldwide will ride the wave so that we break the cycle of abuse of power, violence, and harm for the sake of healthy, loving and equal relationships. I’m pointing out again that there’s a huge necessity to open our eyes.
It’s time to face this issue of abuse of power in all forms, whether in environments and cultures or at home, in our neighborhoods, at work, in schools, in kindergarten, in the circle of our colleagues, relatives, friends…..
My sorrow is that we miss this opportunity of healing the old and new wounds and keep them fed and bleeding. The responsibility lies in all of us (perpetrators, victims, and witnesses) to do the inner work of healing. I believe that all who haven’t been affected by sexual abuse, harassment or assault directly are witnesses. For that reason, I think we all have some responsibility on this central issue of our time.
Some of us may ask: why do we all need to do the inner work and healing process?
It is because a foundational shift in our consciousness needs to happen regarding the power between men and women and feminine and masculine energy within us.
My concern is that if we don’t make a shift and change in our consciousness, we will repeat the mistakes of the past and the cycle of traumatizing relationships and environment will continue.
The world was dominated by men and masculine energy for more than 5000 years. Before those 5000 years, the systems and world were more in balance. It’s time and necessary to turn it around so that we can balance the world and heal the planet again. What does that mean? Women and our feminine energy in all of us are needed more than ever, for the sake of balancing the world. What is the feminine/masculine energy within us? The feminine is our part of feeling, our intuition/ instinct, creativity, and emotions. It’s the part of receiving and being. In contrary to the female energy within us does the masculine energy describe the part of thinking. It’s the part of acting and logical, rational behavior. The world has been driven more by the masculine energy of doing for years.
To my point of view, men need to step more back and into the role of supporter and protector of the sacred feminine space to support the women in their healing process of those traumas, those traumas that were also carried on from generation to generation. This is how we can all contribute to healing the chaos and messiness of the world today. I sense that women need to step more into their leadership in front and lead with the feminine energy and quality of vulnerability, intuition, and emotions. And men need to lead more from the side or behind, hold the space and start to integrate their feminine side-the emotional, vulnerable, intuitional and creative side.
And we all-women and men- need to learn to lead more from the feminine energy within all of us or let us guide by it.
Men and women need to co-create!
As the elder Ilarion Merculief expresses, “Recovering the sacred feminine is the central issue of our times.” This process of healing the central issue of our time needs to happen individually and collectively!
I’m convinced this is also a big challenge and on the other side one that is worth taking. Some elders have already foreseen long ago that the sacred feminine within all of us needs to be healed for the sake of healing the world, breaking cycles of past violence and creating a more peaceful world.
4 powerful steps of healing in this order:
1. Awareness: become aware and being aware of the trauma of harassment, assault or abuse.This realization happens in one’s mindset. This can be facilitated by somebody with healing, coaching and/or therapeutical experience.
2. Acknowledgment: walking through the process of awareness of this life experience by acknowledging oneself followed by self-acceptance. This is an emotional process that includes a lot of grieving and holding the space for grieving with compassion and tenderness. Real change is an emotional process and is necessary to be felt in one’s body to integrate it and for the sake of wholeness. This can happen by doing the healing journaling or can be facilitated by a professional healer, coach and/or therapist.
3. Forgiveness: forgiving the unforgivable by doing “healing rituals”.
4. Letting go: release and let go anyone or anything who keeps one from the highest good by doing “letting go rituals”.
I encourage us all to be willing and open to working on this central issue together. Create groups and circles and reach out to somebody who could give you healing rituals and who might facilitate the processes. And if you feel a need to start individually that’s perfectly fine too.
I trust an average of human natures is willing to make a shift in our consciousness happen based on this wave of “Me Too” and I hope we all together can make change happen regarding the abuse of power between men and women for the sake of balancing our world and more peace.
Annabelle-C. Breuer-Udo is a Leadership Coach, Relationship Coach, Process Facilitator, Psychotherapist and TriYoga Instructor at Transformation from Inside-Out. Contact her and send an email at: email@example.com for information about how coaching, process facilitation, and bodywork can transform your life and make your life feel better, make you achieve greater fulfillment in your relationship.
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